The Socialization Argument

Back in the late '80s my oldest brother and his wife made the decision to homeschool their children. Everyone was completely aghast, including myself.

The major fear was, of course, the effect homeschooling would have on their children's social development. It wasn't long before our fears were proven correct. Their oldest daughter was an odd child, made more odd by the complete lack of interaction between her and other children. She seemed socially backward, and at family gatherings seemed incapable of interacting with even her own cousins.

So, when I made the decision to homeschool, my family was in complete shock. And all the same old fears bubbled to the surface. They feared my daughter would become the same awkward child as her cousins. This fear was quickly proven incorrect.

Thinking about this carefully, I think I have finally figured out what the difference was--beyond the obvious fact that each child develops as an individual, and no kids are exactly alike, that is. I believe the true difference in this case lies in the parents. No offense to my brother or his ex-wife, but neither of them are the most socially capable individuals themselves. Both of them are bright, but we always knew my brother was more book-smarts than common sense anyways. And there is nothing wrong with that.

My daughter is not socially active, and most likely she won't be--not in the typical way. She's outspoken, intelligent and friendly, but only once she gets to know you. She has no problem carrying on a conversation with most people--from the elderly to the toddlers--with the exception of the kids she previously went to school with; kids her own age. Her main obstacle to socialization comes from not understanding the workings of the typical teenage mind. She doesn't go in for cliques, she's not much into sports, and she's not allowed to watch much prime time TV. In short, she's odd. For her, socialization at school proved the biggest obstacle to learning.

I guess what I'm trying to get across in this post, is that the major argument against homeschooling is socialization, and it's a non-issue. If you're worried about the social growth of your child, sign him up for classes at the local public school - many public schools are willing to allow homeschool students to take elective courses. (It helps them with financing. Here in CO, they get at least some financial credit for ANY student taking any courses--homeschool included.) Take your children to the public pool. Have them read books to the residents at the local nursing home. Participate in programs at the local library. But don't let the old socialization argument stop you, or make you feel guilty for making the choice.

In the end, the knowledge they'll gain from homeschooling far outweighs any perceived lack of social interaction.